Day 9 of 12: Sagittarius

It's been a rough day.

I got on some weird sleep pattern over the weekend of going to sleep at 5 am and waking up around noon -- which is fine for weekends, but bad for Mondays. Had to cancel my plans for tonight and stay in working. I don't think I've left my computer all day.

But that was part of today's challenge: Analyzing the situation, making decisions and sticking by them. So whereas I'm usually very wishy washy in my decision making process, I just looked at what had to get done today, started scratching things off the schedule for this evening and decided to stay in and focus on what's putting food on the table.

I haven't really had a lot of time to "focus on forgiveness" today -- but I'm not sure who I really have to forgive for anything. I don't usually hold a grudge. I bought my ex-stepfather a birthday card this week and if I can forgive him and make amends as I did several years ago, trust me I think everyone else is in the clear.

I was also supposed to think before I speak and be more sensitive towards people -- which I did not do at all during a conversation with my webmaster this afternoon. I was short with her because I was pissed I had just awakened and had so much to do that I didn't want to go over stuff I'd already felt like we'd already been through. But she was just trying to help.

A lot of spiritual study suggests visualization. One is to at the end of the day, when you're laying in bed, close your eyes and go over the things you aren't happy about in your day, things you wish you'd handled differently. You're supposed to visualize yourself doing things the way you wish you had and really see and feel what the outcome would have been so that next time you know better. I think I'll be doing a lot of that tonight.

Should I be able to get in bed before 5. God willing. Literally.

And so we forge onto Capricorn.

Trust more. Have more faith. Rely on the Light and the 99% realm, not the 1% shell, the physical world. Express emotions. (Ahem, that one's not so difficult for me.)

The mantra and meditation for this day in the 12 Days of Aries: "I want to bring all future and existing relationships to the level of Soul Mate. I want to relate to all those around me on this heightened plane, and bring greater Light into my life and the lives of others."

I really liked that when I read it. I thought it was really beautiful.

Maybe I should stop looking for a soul mate and just treat the world like one. I think I'll try that for the next 24 hours.


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